My love language....

I don't know if the readers of this blog has read the book "The five love languages" by Gary Chapman - but just in case you haven't it talks about five expressions of love and it explains how to identify and communicate effectivley in a spouse's "love language". To sum up what the five are, they are as follows:

1. Quality time
2. Words of affirmation
3. Gifts
4. Acts of service
5. Physical touch
   

Being one who has been part of developing a relationship course and running marriage seminars , this is one of the books which was a "must" to read. The fact that others had read it and "had their lives transformed" as the doors were opened to their understanding of their own needs and wants from a spouse, and had amazing revelations when they realised what their partner needed and wanted, meant that my expectations were rather high before I sat down and read the book.
This happened a while back, a couple of years ago now I believe...but I have never really been settle about this topic since. For as I was reading the book I thought, I need this, I want that...etc. So, much so, that at the end I though I must be the most demanding woman ever - for I must have not one love language, not two love languages, but FIVE love languages!! Because I liked and needed them ALL!!!
Talking to my dear husband about this did not help greatly, he just put on his "ever suffering expression" and said "imagine what my life is like, having to live with this". So, realising that he was just using it to his advantage and for gaining sympathy I did not consult him anymore.
But now, finally the breakthrough has come, I have realised after a lot of soul searching what my primary love language is...
PHYSICAL TOUCH
I know I need the others too, but if it is one thing I could not be without it is hugs and affection shown in a physical way. So, for people who love me - the best way to show it is through a hug!
- but that does not mean that I won't appreciate a small gift this Christmas along with the hug ;-p

My Father's 70...
the past august my father turned 70th and as a present my and my sisters gave him and my mum a weekend trip to England joined by us girls and husbands. So, with the ten kids we have between us left behind at home (with decent babysitters, just for those of you who were worried..), we set of early Friday morning.
Arrival in England was at 8 o'clock in the morning, so, it was time for both a visit to Leeds castle and a quick stop in Canterbury before heading off to our B&B. The B&B was a lovely old manor house.
Victor and myself got to sleep in a 400 year old four-poster bed (this only happened after Victor had reassured me that the mattress was NOT 400 years old!!)


Saturday we went sightseeing into London, since my father with all his visits to this amazing country, has never ever actually been to this buzzing capital!

Sunday we finished off the trip with a quick stop by at Thurrock lakeside shopping centre before heading off to Stanstead and back home to cold and icy Norway... :-)

It was an excellent trip. The first trip together as adults of the family since the offspring's started popping out a few years ago...

What I have been contemplating ever since my dad's birthday in August though, is the concept of age...just a couple of days after my dad's birthday I myself, turned 35. Time goes so quickly. I see my kids starting school and growing up. More grey hairs appearing for each time I glance into the mirror (never spend too long, looking too closely these days..). More weariness and tiredness. Where does youth, energy and enthusiasm go?? Maybe the answer is simply this: "Gryne, get your butt out of the sofa, start exercising and cut down on the chocolate intake!". This would at lease help on the energy front :-)

I have also come up with some advantages of getting older (for me at least):

• I have realised and accepted my shortcomings (and to be honest and not make things up..)
• I have realised and accepted my strengths (this took a lot of work...)
• These two in turn have made me more confident and better both in my work and privately
• I am actually happy with who I am (most of the time at least :-))
• I am happy with what I have achieved so far in life
• I have a wonderful husband which means no stressing trying to find the perfect partner
• I have three healthy, great kids
• I am more open and relaxed
• I am in a different place now to what and where I was 15 years ago ;-)

A lot has happened since I last wrote, and I guess the summary of it all is more or less as follows..

• Very busy first weeks of the summer with, pre-camps, camps, programs and rain... BUT it was GOOD!! It was wet, tiring, but extremely rewarding and fun!
• Managed to fit in a summer holiday in this year! Hurrah!! Went to UK - a few days in Grantham visiting mother-in-law, before we headed up north to Scotland with Russell, Jacquie and girls. A good and much needed break!
• The autumn was also rather event full. Firstly, Mattias started school! He was very ready for it, but it was also a bit scary to begin with, but these days he seems to have settled in nicely :-) Secondly, my husband seem been away more than his been at home - but that's the nature of the job... :-) Thirdly, one of his travels involved me and the kids as well :-D Had 10 informative, warm, exciting days in Greece! Oh, how I LOVE warm, sunny countries, especially after our wet summer....
• In the middle of all our business we manged to finish the flat in our basement, so, now we have a tenant!! Kids are very excited about it and I just feel a great relief to finally have the basement done...!!!
• Lastly - I have, for some strange reason, butterflies in my tummy when I think of Christmas - have not been so excited about Christmas for a VERY long time! Think I am looking forward to spending it at home, in our own house. And before that I am planning to bake cookies and make Christmas decorations with the kids, FUN, FUN, FUN!!

Some images from the 17th May - Norway's national day!
National costumes, parade, games and fun :-)

Especially for you Amanda :-)

Just thought you might like to see how much the three angles appreciate the Christmas presents the received from their auntie & uncle....

Must just add that this picture was taken a few weeks back when the weather was colder & wetter than is presently the case!!

This picture just makes me smile :-)

Sometimes, like today, when I feel tired, slightly overwhelmed and not very inspired and all I really feel like doing is hiding far under my duvet and never ever get out of bed again, then the exuberance and happiness of my children turn my gloomy darkened view of the world back into the rays of sunshine. How can anybody not smile when smiles, hugs and laughter is all around. Don't know what I have done to deserve such a happy, loving bunch that is my family, but I'm non the less abundantly grateful!!!

Back home again...

We are back from a wonderful holiday in England. I had not realised HOW much I miss that place. It is strange that a country which stricktly speaking is not my own still has managed to steal a chunck of my heart.

It was so good to meet up with family and friends again. The cousins also really enjoyed catching up with eachother. A lot of laughs, play and fun - for kids and adults alike!!

It was also good just to get away from the business of everyday life with work and home demands. It is what is needed at times to make one survive the pressures of life.

I feel another holiday calling - good it's not too long before summer when another England trip is in the pipeline!

Involuntary exercise....

It always happen when Victor is away! Everything looks like it is clearing up, then Victor goes away for a few days and the downpour starts. It seems like it has been snowing nonstop since he left. Which means HARD work for me!
We have one of these manual snow showing tools which takes a lot of effort to show up and down the road to our house & the more snow it is the heavier it gets... This in one of those things which I am convinced is really a mans job!! I am all for equality but all in moderation. One would not want to end up looking like a man with huge bulging muscles!!
While all this white fluffy stuff keep falling from the sky my beloved husband is lazing about up north at Finnmarksvidda, skiing, dog sledging, building snow holes and igloo's and then proceeds to spend the night in them. All this from a man born and brought up in suburban Britain, not bad really :-)
Anyway, this still leaves me on my own to fight the elements here at home - maybe I should interpret this as a subtle start to my fitness regime...

Tomorrow...

tomorrow has yet again turned into today. I keep making promises to myself that "tomorrow I will do better", "tomorrow I'll do something about it"...but then tomorrow never seems to happen!

The last few days I've had this aim to start the morning by doing some exercises. I don't know what it is but I have recently begun feeling older - everything is so much more of an effort. Not sure if it is related to the rapid passing of time towards mid-thirties or if is mainly pure unfitness. Not being able to do much about the passing of time, I've decided to go for the fitness regime! That is if I can ever get started...

I've found a picture from days gone by - see if me as 21 will be inspiration enough... :-)

Will keep you posted!

Inspirert av Heidi's "drepe en forelske" blogg så utgir jeg nå en "forbli forelsket" liste...

#1 Gjem den først "mo i knærne" føelsen godt inni hjerte ditt og ta den frem og kjenn på den ofte
fordel: du glemmer aldri den betatte følelsen
ulempe: du forblir forelsket...
#2 Stirr minst 10 min på mannen i ditt liv hver eneste dag (om du ikke har den virkelige utgaven foran deg så får et bilde gjøre samme nytten) mens du sukker av tilfredshet over at han er din
fordel: du forblir betatt og synes at han er den kjekkeste mannen noensinne
ulempe: alle andre menn blekner i sammenligning....
#3 Vær oppmerksom på alle de gode kvalitetene han har som du setter pris på...
- som at han ler av dine tåpelige vitser
- som at han alltid setter pris på maten du lager selv når den ikke når opp til Jamie Oliver standard...
- som at han alltid kjører de lange kjøreturene slik at du kan sove i passasjersetet ved siden av
- som at han tar sin del av oppvasken uten å søle eller sutre for mye
- som at han henter ved og tenner opp i peisen når det er kaldt
fordel: de tingene som ellers ville irritert deg går i glemmeboken for du er så fokusert på det du virkelig liker og setter pris på
ulempe: du har ingen ting igjen å irritere deg for....
#4 Aldri slutt og overrask han
- vask bilen uoppfordret
- la han sove lenge om morgenen uten å klage og vekk han med en rykende fersk kopp kaffe og en sjokoladebit
fordel: du kjeder aldri deg selv eller han - livet blir fullt av overraskelser
ulempe: tingene blir da aldri monotone eller forutsigbare....
#5 Snakk med han! -men ikke unøvendig babbel...
fordel: kommunikasjonen holdes åpen og man fortsetter å vokse sammen isted for fra hverandre
ulempe: det kan ta tid og føre til at man deler følelser og blir mer intime og samkjørte...
#6 Ta vare på deg selv (menn liker velpleide kvinner)
fordel: du får pleiet deg selv og det er godt
du blir i godt humør
du beholder ditt fantastiske utsende
ulempe: resten av Adam's ætt kan komme til å bli misunnelige på din heldige utkårede
#7 La mannen få litt "alene" tid hver dag uten å klage (det er faktisk sant - hule tendensene eksisterer i realiteten!)
fordel: du får en blid mann som har tid og energi til å være sosial med deg og barna resten av dagen
ulempe: du får litt tid for deg selv du og....
#8 La forelskelsen gli over til ekte kjærlighet
fordel: forholdet kommer til å vare for resten av livet
ulempe: det er ingen.... ;-)

Merk - er ulempene virkelig ulemper????? :-)
LENGE LEVE KJÆRLIGHETEN!!!!

I try to not constantly write about my kids or being a mother - I know (from personal experience) that when a parents life revolves very much around the little angles, but I am also very aware that I am not just a mother and my life is not just my kids, but I am afraid that today it has to be a blog about just that....motherhood....because today is MOTHERS DAY in Norway....
The day started like many a Sunday, husband away at work, so no breakfast in bed - but at least I got a lay-in until 8.30 am. which was not bad. At which time I had a squealing child on the toilet "I'm FINISHED!" and a puppy whining as loud as she could in her cage "let me out - I want to play!!". I dragged myself out of bed, put on my dressing gown (yep, old enough to be the proud owner of a thick and comfortable dressing gown :-)) and went downstairs to deal with the crises'. I subsequently put on children's television and trying to wake myself gently on the sofa with a glass of fruit juice whilst browsing in a magazine. Then the inevitable nagging starts - I want a drink, I'm thirsty - that crises dealt with - then starts the arguments - my dear son had manged to leave his Nintendo DS game in the car last night, and with husband away at work meant that the car was gone with him, so, no possibility of getting the game for a few hours. His older sister is merrily playing away on her game which he of course wants to borrow...no chance of that... It all culminates with mother (voice being slightly louder than appropriate) saying "Today is mothers day you should all be nice to me, to each other, to everybody today. I don't want any more arguments today - that can be your present to me!!" I then march off to the toilet (one of the few places a mother of three small children and two dogs can have a moment of peace). A couple of minutes later there is a knock on the door and three children come marching in pressies in hand - a lovely princess (self made from a candle), a gift card for mamma's favourite clothes store and a home made card telling me what a nice and kind mamma I am.... I am now sitting in the sofa, sipping my cup of tea, while my son is playing on his sisters Nintendo DS, the sister is sitting on the sofa knitting while the little one is dancing away in front of the stereo - The kind mamma is having a wonderful Mothers Day after all :-)

I received a challenge a while back from Heidi Karethe...
Five things (most) people don't know about me...

1. I have a "thing" for red sports cars...
2. My first ever boyfriend was British (but he was not the one I am now married to...)
3. I drank coffee for about two months when I first started going out with Victor (oh, what stupid things love makes you do :-))
4. Maths was my favorite subject at school...
5. I used to spit after men with beards when I was a child

- anything you did not already know Heidi?? :-D

One of Victor's America highlights... :-)

In Florida we rented a car for the week & Victor was most pleased... It was big, American and fun to drive (apparently...)!!!

Washington DC
Despite the fear that my readers might faint with the shock of writing another blog so quick after the last one...I am willing to take the risk :-)
Going to see my father-in-law with family was really nice - it had been too long - the kids did not know their grandad or auntie or uncle, but now they not only know them they also grew to love them while we were staying with them. They would much rather have uncle Andrew and auntie Lauren babysit then come with mamma to the mall (wonder why???? ;-p). My father-in-law was an extremely patient taxi driver, taking me from one shopping centre to another...thank you!!

Seeing the capital of America was also excellent. We spend one day wondering around, going to museums, seeing the white house and having lunch at Union Station. Kids really enjoyed the natural history museum!!
We went in again on Victors birthday - that was what he wanted to do... :-) We then spend the day going to see all the memorials. They were all very impressive - I liked the Roosevelt one though, were you see the different stages of his presidency.... Also liked the latest one from the second world war! Even though walking through the memorial do make an impression, can't help but think about the fact that these were men and women who left family and friends behind so that other could gain or keep their freedom...
I am glad we were able to make the trip and finally go over and visit our family there as well as all the sight-seeing we got to do!

We are back!

One of my best holidays as a family!! I have to say that I really loved my first ever visit to America (loved as in "love to go back there on holiday" not loved as in "would like to move there"... - just in case any of you were getting worried ;-p)

There were a lot of highlights, so, I am going to spread them out over a couple of blogs. For now - Florida with Disney world & Sea World.

Mattias's highlight was I believe meeting and touching "Lightening McQueen" (the red racing car from the film "Cars" for those of my readers who might not have the faintest idea of what I am talking about...

Miranda just loved all the princess's in Magic Kingdom...she is in a real princess face and is overly excited whenever she gets to put a dress on and pretend to be a princess..

Miriam enjoyed the fireworks and she also got herself a favourite Disney character - Tinker Bell! So, in the shops (which were plentiful) she spotted out all the Tinker Bell stuff and wished for it all..

My favourite was, I must admit, the Magic Kingdom. I know it is supposed to be most exciting for the young kids, but I really loved seeing all the characters which I read about when I was a child - it was magically! The size of the rids were also more to my liking...the Everest ride in the animal kingdom was not for me!!! (relived having the excuse of a young child so having to stay on the ground).

I was also very taken by Sea World! Stroking the sting rays was excellent, as well as playing with the dolphins. The shows there and Disney World was also totally memorable - it was all just awesome :-)

So, conclusion, We will be back.

The next report will be focusing on Washington, visiting family and Christmas!!